I am ready to start the first lesson Free
“Create the Love, Teamwork, and Fun you really want in your relationship with these Five Keys to Thriving Partnership.”
“There is a next level of intimacy, happiness, and ease
just waiting for you to claim it! Let Mark Michael Lewis show you how.”
— Casey Capshaw, Director of the Authentic Man Program.
, and (Powerful Romance Strategies to Stoke The Fire In Long-Term Relationships)
Do You Remember The Ecstatic Joy Of Falling In Love With Your Partner?
Would You Like To Recreate It, But Even Better?
no limit to how good, no limit to how bad.
I need to ask you a blunt question:
Is your relationship headed for Thriving or Suffering? Because it’s either one or the other.
Relationships are like gardens, they are organic. They are either growing and flourishing, or dying and being taken over by bugs and weeds.
If you don’t know, in your gut and without question, that your relationship is headed towards thriving, I challenge you to take 5 minutes and read about some clients of mine and discover how their solution might help you.
This Story can change the course of your life!
You see, I’ve been doing life and relationship coaching for 20 years and written two books on relationships. When people learn this about me, it is amazing the personal details they will share with me and ask for my advice…especially at a party after a couple drinks.
Meet Melody and Darrel – Can you Relate?
That is exactly the situation I was in when I met Melody and Darrel for the first time. They told me that they were (recently) in love and ecstatic about it. It showed.
They were so excited to tell me about how special their connection was and how easy it was to talk to each other. It just felt so good to be in each others presence. Most importantly, they insisted, they both trusted each other to really hear the others concerns, which had them open their hearts more and more to one another. They were soul-mates.
Now, although I have heard this story hundreds of times, it always inspires me, even though I know that 9 times out of 10, a year from now they are going to be at each others throats…IF they make it that long.
In spite of that, I always get inspired and encourage them, because I know in my own life and the lives of my clients, that a relationship filled with Love, Teamwork, and Fun IS possible.
Unlikely? Sure. But possible? Absolutely!
Anyway, I liked them immediately and felt warm and fuzzy being near them in love.
Predictably, things changed a bit.
The next time I saw Darrel was at a birthday gathering, where he came up to me in a group of people. After some pleasantries, we “somehow” ended up in a corner alone in conversation, where I asked how Melody was doing.
“Oh yeah, it’s been a while hasn’t it” he said, as pieces of our initial conversation seemed to come back to him as we talked about it. “She’s great and we’re great,” Darrel added hastily.
“That sounds … great.” I responded, mirroring his voice tone around the word “great,” then waited in silence, guessing that he had much more to share.
“Yeah,” he repeated, “great” and fell into a thoughtful silence of his own. “You know,” he said after a pause, “I am remembering how happy Melody and I were when we met you. Not that we’re not happy now, but…relationships can get tricky…”
I assured him that I did know about that, and invited him to tell me his story.
So what was really going on?
It turns out that, through time, Darrel and Melody started getting on each other’s nerves. Instead of expecting the best from each other and giving each other the benefit of the doubt, they had started arguing with each other.
Their initial “spark” seemed nowhere to be found, and in its place was a much less pleasant reality:
Hurt – Suspicion, distrust, and resentment – Sometimes if felt suffocating.
Frustration – Increased numbers of arguments and negative thinking.
Disappointment – A lack of physical intimacy.
Tired – Less time and energy to spend together. Emotional detachment.
Stuck – Feeling like there are no options.
Self-Doubt – Feeling like there you must have some deficiency that is causing all this.
Darrel had tried “working on” the relationship with Melody.
He offered her reassurance, that he loved her and that he would change somehow. He was hoping and wishing the relationship would survive but he wasn’t so sure.
He was convinced that they were the only ones in the world this was happening to.
Darrel’s “duct tape” patches for the relationship — swallowing the sour pill and digging the hole deeper or smoothing things over and hoping the patch will hold — simply were not working.
I asked him what he wanted to do.
I told Darrel that this is not the kind of thing that gets better on its own.
“You don’t have the time to sit and wait for a miracle to happen, for Melody to suddenly change her mind or her personality” I told him.
The fact about relationships is that they are either headed towards thriving or towards suffering…
…and the tendency is towards suffering.
This is why I see so many broken relationships and many others staying together in miserable condition. They are suffering– devoid of teamwork, lacking intimacy, and certainly no fun.
“If you don’t change your path, Darrel, where are you two headed?” I exclaimed.
His blank stare told me my words were having an impact. He knew this was the truth, however painful.
“The truth is, “I told him, “It’s not your fault.”
Our culture is messed up. Too much change, differing values and expectations, inherited patterning.
We have no training. We weren’t taught this in school, in fact, no one ever taught most of us how to deal with the challenges of modern relationships.
I implored with Darrel to take action now, before it is too late. “Don’t let this all-too-common slide into suffering happen to you.”
He agreed, and added that if he doesn’t make it work with Melody, his secret dread was that he would just do it all again with the next person.
I gave him my card and he said he would certainly call me, he just needed to check in with her about it.
The next time I heard from Melody and Darrel was…
When Melody showed up in my office.
Their relationship had been moving slowly, but steadily downhill until she ended up here…devastated.
She woke up one day and realized that, despite everything she had tried, her once-blissful relationship had been shattered. Her whole world was turning upside down and she had no idea what to do. She felt like she was on the edge of a relationship abyss — with the idea of breakup relentlessly pulling her over.
On the one hand, she felt a searing heartache that felt like it was going to tear her apart. On the other, she felt numb and empty.
Melody was experiencing:
Numb – Sleepless nights, Loss of appetite then binge eating for comfort, massive depression.
Hopeless – Things appeared beyond repair. Felt like you are going over the same old arguments again and again. Trying to reason with the partner. Having ineffective, nasty communication or long bouts of stony silence. Lingering in poisonous unresolved conflicts.
Powerless – Partner is hard-headed. Self is not capable, like a deer in the headlights. Nothing seems to get them to change. Not believing they even care. Feeling rejected, unloved and alone. Seeing your own part in the pushing away, even when really wanting closeness.
Trapped – Boxed in, social, financial, family, friends – Can’t leave.
Undeserving – You made this bed, now you have to lie in it. You can’t do any better. utterly defeated.
I snapped her out of it.
After hearing Melody unload all this, I told her that I understood. It looks really bad. I see that she is scared and doesn’t know what to do.
Then I asked her, “What do you want to do? Do you want to save your relationship with Darrel or are you done and just asking for my blessing to end things?”
She stared at me in shock. She couldn’t believe I asked her that. Melody cried and asked for an explanation. I just looked at her with care.
As she took a moment to think about it, she remembered the hours she had spent discussing the issues with a friend who was convinced it was Darrel’s fault, not hers. She had come to believe that their history of pain, suffering and conflict seemed like an impossible burden to carry, and she would love to just put it all down and simply walk away.
But her heart felt broken at the thought of losing what they had and she didn’t really want to let it go. She was just hopeless and couldn’t see how to make it work.
She realized that she owed it to herself and her future daughters and sons to change this pattern and break this cycle forever.
You need to act, and smart.
I asked her, “Is this pattern going to change on its own?”
She answered slowly, “No.”
“It’s time for you to commit to master the game of relationships” I told her. “I am here to help you, and this will happen fast, but it all relies on YOU and what YOU are going to do right this moment.”
“Do you really want to dig deep and fix this once and for all? It’s simple really. Make the choice that you will learn what you need to learn. Get on the path and take this course to Create Thriving in this and all of your partnerships.”
The Key To Thriving Is In Your Mindset – Choose to Thrive!
The people who fail at relationships, fail because they they never take the truly hard action it requires to truly thrive:
The action to change their mindset. To tap into the power they have to make a difference, to get on track, to get good at partnership.
The irony is that taking this action is actually a relief. It is the NOT choosing that causes the agony and despair.
Is this pattern going to change on its own? No.
Melody made the choice. YES!
I took her under my wing and taught her the essential steps on how to save her relationship with Darrel. Walking piece-by-piece through The 5 Keys of Thriving Partnership, Melody started to think clearly, make new choices, and feel confident about her new skills.
Day by day, step by step, in only a few months Melody was applying the tools and strategies I gave her. She learned so much about herself and the tangible things she could do, even Darrel was unresponsive. Bit by bit, the barriers were broken down.
She found words to describe what she REALLY wanted with Darrel. She recognized opportunities to build common ground with him and took them. Things started getting easier, momemtum began to build, and true hope started to dawn.
The small breakthroughs got bigger and stronger. Melody was getting her old spark back … and Darrel was responding by getting inspired to give his best to her, to open his heart to her.
They started to talk, really talk, in a way they never really had before – sober, profound, not like the pollyanna way they had in the beginning, but really understanding and accepting each other and figuring out how to work together in a way that worked for both of them.
The floodgates opened.
It wasn’t like they no longer had any conflict, in fact, a really big one erupted when this new way of being was fresh for both of them. Melody had a total flip in the way she handled it compared to the past. She found herself doing things that at first seemed counter-intuitive in the face of his anger. She avoided her first instinct to beg, blame or be a victim, and to let go of the anger and frustration.
She knew she wasn’t going to sell herself out anymore so she felt safe. She could actually listen to what he had to say and find a way forward — in partnership.
Their partnership became stronger and better than it ever was before! Their problems literally became the solutions!
The next time I saw them together, they were staring at each other with renewed energy and love, hand in hand, laughing and smiling at each other…like a honeymoon couple!
And the Sex? Well, a gentleman never tells. And, the look in their eyes said it all.
Do You Want More Teamwork, Intimacy, and Fun in your Relationship?
Would you like…
- To know that you have a rock solid set of skills to make relationships work, regardless of your relationship status?
- Confidence that you are competent in resolving conflict and creating win/win solutions?
- To take your existing relationships to a level of intimacy you never before thought possible?
- Tools that you can use in any relationship (business, as a parent, with extended family and with friends) that allow you to be a more authentic, integrated, and comfortable human being to relate with?
- Real, on-the-ground practices to evolve your relationships smoothly and reliably?
- Coaching specific to your relationship, that will fast track your experience from Suffering to Synergy?
…then you will love
Creating Thriving Partnerships: An Advanced Course in Relationship Success.
Think about it. If this Creating Thriving Partnerships program really can give you the skills to create love, passion, and partnership where you used to create pain, resentment, and resignation, isn’t it worth WHATEVER price it may cost to get it? What else can you do that offers you as much bang for your buck?
Creating Thriving Partnerships is an advanced, comprehensive online learning course (with the option of 1 on 1 coaching), that gives you the power to create lasting intimacy and skillful results in all of your relationships.
Creating Thriving Partnerships will empower you and call you forth to a higher level in the relationships that matter most to you, whether romantic, professional or familial.
This course will gently push your edges, in the best possible ways. It will take you beyond what you already know, in a way that leverages your existing skills.
90% of your happiness as well as your frustration comes from your relationships with other people. – Brian Tracy
As we enter the 21st century, relationships are more difficult than they have ever been. People are expecting and demanding more from their relationships than ever before. Our great grandparents were happy if they could just manage keep the family together and have grandchildren. This is not enough for us.
We Want Passion, Love, Partnership, Adventure, Discovery, And Fun.
Romance, Attention, Devotion, Kindness, And Appreciation.
While our standards have become more demanding, our inherited communication skills come from past centuries. They don’t work to create the happiness we really want. 50% of marriages are predicted to end in divorce, and more than 50% include infidelity.
If we want to experience lasting love, we must learn new skills!
Creating Thriving Partnerships
gives us the tools and attitudes we need to create the
Love, Intimacy, and Partnership we Truly Desire
We all know that successful relationships are not built on how we look or how much money we make. Although these are helpful in getting our foot through the door, it is how we communicate who we are that creates the “chemistry” that attracts us to each other, opens our hearts, and excites our bodies.
The truth is, love comes from the soul to soul connection we make with our partner. :It is the energy that flows between us that lets us know that we are really alive and participating in the divine dance of life. Creating a loving partnership is perhaps the most rewarding experience we can have as human beings. It expresses our deepest longings and brings forth our greatest passions. As the saying goes, while love might not make the world go ’round, it is love that makes the ride worthwhile!
At the same time, many people find that love is difficult to find and keep. This journey to love is fraught with danger. As one client of mine put it, “there are so many ways that things can go wrong, I am just looking for one way to make t go right!” To navigate the rocky waters of relation”ship,” we need to learn how to use the winds to propel towards our destination. We need to transform the challenges that normally sink a relationship into the opportunities that build the foundation for love. If we can’t avoid and work through the misunderstandings that create walls between our souls, our connection dries up. The love we used to feel becomes a memory that haunts the relationship instead of fueling it.
When, on the other hand, we can look into our partner’s eyes, know that they see our real self, and light up with joy because of it, the floodgates of our heart open wide, letting intimacy, passion, and partnership flow.
We must find the keys of communication that unlock the door to our partner’s heart. When we can discover and honor their deepest values. while at the same time communicating and honoring our own, we can build a true partnership that lasts a lifetime.
Let’s be honest here. Our romantic relationship is the heart of our lives. When it is going well, everything works better. We are happy to get up in the morning, the challenges we face are less stressful, and our home becomes a haven that recharges our emotional batteries. We know that whatever happens, we will be comforted and inspired by the love and support of our partner. When the day is over, we will end it in the embrace of their arms and with the sweetness of their lips.
On the other hand, when our romantic relationship is distant or strained, that comfort and support is nowhere to be found. Instead of a safe haven in which to regain our strength, our home becomes another source of stress. Instead of rejoicing in the presence of our beloved, we find ourselves alone, or worse yet, alone in the presence of the person we are supposed to be in love with. We might even become cynical about love and think that romance is just a fantasy made up by advertisers and Hollywood producers. Deep down though, we know that something critical is missing – something without which our lives feel fundamentally incomplete.
Fortunately, no matter how much or little love you feel in your life, if you learn the appropriate skills, you can have more of it. You really can experience the love you have always desired. It will take work, certainly. Everything worthwhile in life does! However, you can have it. You can bring new love into your life, and you can revitalize relationships in which love has died.
More importantly, you are worth it. You are worth doing whatever it takes to create the happiness you have envisioned. It is time for you to look yourself in the eyes and decide to take the next step on your journey to true fulfillment. I don’t know that this program is that next step for you. What I do know is this – if you don’t make a new choice and take a new step, your life isn’t going to change. Why not take the bull by the horns and make the decision to bring more love into your life RIGHT NOW! Your future is waiting. May you live it without regrets!
Suffering To Synergy provides the means to resolve conflict, deepen our connection, and experience the partnership we truly desire in our relating. It creates a context of honor, integrity, and mutual respect in which we can experience greater pleasure, aliveness, and FUN! The more passion, satisfaction, and fulfillment you want in your relating, the more valuable this program will be for you.
In it, you will learn how to:
Build the foundation for True Intimacy
Find the Key to open your partner’s Heart
Co-create agreements that fulfill your deepest values
Create deeper connection and understanding
Honor Your Boundaries while Honoring your partner’s
Discover the deeper values that make your partner tick
Recognize and overcome the attitude that kills intimacy
Build thriving partnerships at Work, with Family and Friends
One thing is certain: after listening to Problems Are The Solution, you will never be able to look at relating the same way again!
AADISK #1: Becoming Conscious of our Process
- Discover the unconscious obstacles to partnership
- Learn the mind set that causes the problem
- Then learn the mind set that resolves it
- Open your mind to the possibility of true love
- Explore the importance of psychological boundaries
- Honor your boundaries without crossing your partner’s boundaries
- Examine the dynamic that kills intimacy
- Recognize and overcome resentment and resignation
AADISK #2: Culpability, Emotions, and Rules
- Uncovering our Unconscious and Implicit Expectations
- Escape the trap of Non-Judgment
- Learn the judgments that transcend victimization
- Discover the power of Conscious, Explicit Agreements
- Building trust, Integrity, and mutual respect
- Unrolling the Red Carpet of Culpability
- Creating a Safe Space for communication
- Setting the Stage For Intimacy and Connection
- Learning to listen to the messages of our Emotions
- Harnessing the energy of our Emotions to deepen partnership
AADISK #3: The D.E.A.R. Culpability Process
- Learn The Four Steps of the Culpability process
- The crucial difference between broken and unspoken rules.
- The power of Owning our Emotions and our Mistakes
- Exploring our underlying values and deepest desires
- Restoring the Integrity and Deepening of the container of relating
- Using our Problems as the Solution to Open Our Hearts
- How you can use any conflict to inspire Higher Level Play
- Custom Designing your relating to express your Highest Values
AADISK #4: Artistry Principles and Synergy Process
- The practicality and glory of Good Sportspersonship
- The difference between Seriousness and Being Responsible
- Re-Starting the Music and Represencing the Dance
- The one piece of Coaching that Always Sets you straight
- Overcoming the challenge and danger of our A
- Coverupping and “Being a Meanie
- The Synergy Process: Negotiating Win-Win Rules
- Synergy and RelationDancing
The finer details about the course:
Creating Thriving Partnerships is truly an advanced course in relationship mastery. It includes a 4 hour section on how to move from Suffering to Synergy — to triage the existing issues in your relationship and stop the bleeding if you are in a relationship that is spiraling downward quickly. Then 16 hours on The 5 Keys To Creating Thriving Partnerships to establish the foundation that you will need in every relationship you are in for the rest of your life. Last (or first, if you desire), there is a 4 hour course on The Dance of Advanced Romance – including How To Have Passionate, Satisfying, and Transcendent Sex.
Audio Lessons—Each of the 24 lessons contains 30 minutes of user friendly audio content in multiple formats to meet your busy lifestyle. Listen from your laptop, iPhone or other mobile device.
Audio Exercises—Each of the 24 exercise sessions are 30 minutes of deeper insights into the topic, paired with short answer questions designed to integrate the lesson in your life. It turns the theory of the lesson into practice in your real-world relationships.
PLUS, to make the deal even sweeter, we are going to include some extraordinary bonuses:
Not only will you receive the full Problems Are The Solution audio program in an instant mp3 download, you will also receive the audio program entitled: “Moving from Right/Wrong to Right/Right thinking.” This live seminar shows you the step by step process that creates the Victim/Self-Righteousness dynamic, and shows you how you can transcend it.
Normally $19.95, we include it FREE with this special offer.
Untangling Sex, Romance, and Intimacy
to Weave a Loving Partnership
In this live seminar, Mark unveils the hidden mind sets that lead us to create conflict and distance where we want synergy and love. Sex, Romance, and Intimacy are often put together into the same category – as if having one naturally led to having the others. Mark explores the separate realms that Sex, Romance, and Intimacy represent – giving each their due – then integrating them such that they multiply each other. By learning to recognize our different motivations and values, we can co-create a a harmonious balance between our values and desires.
Last, we know that you have your mind and heart blown open after listening to these powerful ideas, and will likely have personal questions about how to deal with the new opportunities they make possible. So, we will also include a video response to one of your top questions – by Mark Michael Lewis himself. Simply send in your email question, and Mark will create a video response and send you a private link to view it online. Imagine, getting your most important question personally answered, directly from the author. Mark charges $250 for 1 hour of coaching, and expects to spend about 10-15 minutes filming and posting each answer, so this is easily worth $75. It is yours free with this program.
Confronting Ultimate Intimacy
Would You Share interview with Jason Lange
In this 1-hour video interview Mark discusses practical details about how to create intimacy – in his own life and the life of his clients, INCLUDING how to overcome the dangers and challenges that intimacy typically brings. What doe it mean to be vulnerable? How can you use intimacy to deepen your self-understanding? How does the depth of your mutual trust impact all of your relationship? This is Mark at his improvisational best – summarizing multiple courses of information into a compact conversation.
Mark Michael Lewis explores 3 types of dependence in relationship (dependence, co-dependence, counter-dependence), the difference between dependence and interdependence, and the potential of interdependence that independence makes possible. He also contrasts the difference between relationships around OTOH the value of our self/person and OTO the value of our skills/actions. Last, he explores the emotional and interpersonal consequences of dependence vs. Interdependence, especially pseudo-intimacy.
We have created 24 worksheets for each of the exercises – read the questions as I ask them in the audio, and write your answers into your own documents – so you can keep track of your insights, plan next actions, and write down your personal answers to the questions.
We will also include the transcripts for all 24 lessons AND the 24 exercises – word for word, formatted for increased comprehension
We will also include a 90 minute seminar Mark gave on how to create an Inspired Partnership – Experiencing More Intimacy, Teamwork, and Fun in Your Relationship, where he offers an insight, a trick, and a choice to empower and inspire you to take your relationship to new heights!