Lesson 16 Exercise

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Your Task: Listen to this exercise and follow all instructions. You'll want something to capture your thoughts (journal, text file, etc.)

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The Game of Intimacy, Soul to Soul – Rules 4-6

Exercise Questions:

Rule 4: I will honor the privacy of what my partner shares with me.

Choose a relationship that you want to play a Game of Intimacy. Imagine sharing something really vulnerable with them.
(5 Seconds)

What if your partner kept that think mostly private. Contrast that with the idea of them keeping it totally private.
(30 Seconds)

Rule 5: I will understand and accept my partner

Imagine your partner sharing something truly vulnerable. What might they share? how might that feel?
(30 Seconds)

Notice the difference between what they are sharing and who they are. Imagine clarifying the difference between who they are as a person, and what they think, feel or want.
(30 Seconds)

Notice how easy it would be to shame them. Imagine making the choice consciously not to shame them.
(30 Seconds)

Imagine listening to what your partner has to say, and try to really understand it from their perspective. The more accurate your understanding the more you can really share the experience.
(30 Seconds)

Move beyond understanding and into beauty. Find the positive human desires in what they are saying.
(30 Seconds)

Nothing untrue can be truly beautiful. Illusions might be fantastic, but they do not create beauty.

Rule 6: I will share my vulnerable truth with my partner.

(Level 1-No lying, Level 2-No illusions, Level 3-No hiding)

Explore your relationship with lying. What are some things you have misrepresented with your partner?
(30 Seconds)

What haven’t you said, that had the effect of your partner mis-understanding reality. Where have you fostered illusions?
(30 Seconds)

Imagine being face to face with your partner? What is something you are afraid to share or have given up on them knowing this about you.
(30 Seconds)

Choose one from this list that is a 3-4 on a scale of 1-10
(10 Seconds)

Imagine making the choice to share in the face of you fear/hesitation.
(30 Seconds)

Imagine asking your partner to listen to a share in a way that they understand and accept you.
(30 Seconds)

Clarify the difference between understanding the accuracy of your share vs. understanding the beauty of what you are sharing.

Imagine sharing vulnerable and listening to whether they are accurately understanding what you have to say.
(30 Seconds)

Imagine sharing vulnerable and listening to whether they have a beautiful understanding what you are sharing.
(30 Seconds)

Take a moment and imagine thanking you partner for going on the ride with you and hearing what you had to say.
(15 Seconds)

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